


The Baseball Metaphor

by Dance_Elle_Dance



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Crack, F/M, Humor, Romance, Surprise Kissing, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-26
Updated: 2015-08-26
Packaged: 2018-04-17 08:10:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,266
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4659150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dance_Elle_Dance/pseuds/Dance_Elle_Dance
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Over Chinese food in Garcia's tech room, Reid's sexuality jokingly comes into discussion. Determined to prove himself, he sets his sights on JJ. (Originally posted on 6/18/10.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Baseball Metaphor

**Author's Note:**

> Re-post of my first ReidJJ. Please enjoy the silliness!

The day was passing by rather slowly at the BAU. JJ was figuring out which case they needed to go on next, Hotch was busy in the office, Rossi was off…doing Rossi-like things, and the three other members of the team were holed up with Garcia in her lab eating Chinese food, much to the techie's dismay.

Reid sat in the chair next to Garcia, who was slurping on some noodles quite carefully as to not damage her babies - her "babies" being any and all pieces of technology in the room - while Prentiss sat on the floor against the wall, and Morgan sat on the other side of the room, also against the wall.

The Chinese take-out was sprawled on the floor in the large space between Morgan and Prentiss, a giant pool for whoever wanted to reach in and grab one of the tasty items.

Garcia was toying with some role playing game on her computer, and Reid was watching quite intently when Morgan asked the question.

"You're staring awfully hard at that girl, Reid."

Reid turned toward the aforementioned man, his brow furrowed with confusion. "What?"

Morgan tipped his cup of chicken lo mein to the screen with an impish grin. "Princess over there."

Reid cocked his head to the side before looking back at the screen, where a busty blonde dressed in armor was walking along. Several of the virtual-men catcalled at her and shouted, "Fair maiden!"

"Hey, sweetie," Garcia drawled. "You ogle the fair maiden, you ogle me. Because, technically, I _am_ her."

Morgan chuckled at Garcia's comment, while Reid looked a combination of flustered and confused. Prentiss snorted into her noodles at the look on the young genius's face.

"Er…what?"

Morgan, smirking, had known he found his opening. "You were staring at virtual hottie like you've never seen a woman before."

Reid opened and closed his mouth several times, like a fish. He found himself unable to say anything.

"Admiring the graphics?" Prentiss chided with a friendly smile.

Morgan turned to the brunette woman and gave her a wink.

"You appreciate the fact that he's admiring _my_ graphics?" Garcia yelped, looking at Morgan with wide eyes.

"Baby girl, you know I'm the only one who as access to your graphics."

Garcia grinned slightly despite herself. "Access denied, good sir."

Morgan grinned back, enjoying their usual banter, while Reid tried to stutter out a reply.

"I do believe," Prentiss said, looking at Reid with all of the intrigue of a Picasso painting, "we have rendered Reid speechless."

"Hm," Morgan hummed, his dark, curious eyes looking at his friend.

Reid finally seemed to gather himself, and said, "I wasn't staring at her!"

"So you were staring at the knaves around her?" Garcia smirked slightly, patting Reid on the shoulder.

"Aw!" Prentiss smiled and Morgan laughed.

Reid's face was now the color of an overly ripe tomato, and he found himself, again, lost for words.

"Must've hit a chord," Morgan stage-whispered.

"Chord? What chord?" Reid had now gone from confused to indignant, his voice rising several decibels.

"The…swinging-on-the-other-side-of-the-plate chord." Morgan smiled lazily at him. He enjoyed picking on Reid like this - he was just too fun when he was ruffled.

"I don't even play baseball!"

This caused all three of Reid's friends to burst out laughing.

"What? _What_?"

"That's not what we're talking about, hon." Garcia grinned at Reid, who looked at her like she was insane.

It was silent for a moment before Morgan's words truly sank into his head.

"But…but I'm _not_!" Reid insisted, now even more adamant than before.

Morgan looked to Prentiss and then to Garcia before saying, "Prove it."

"What?"

"Just what I said - prove it."

"You don't really believe I'm - " Reid started, stumbling slightly over his words in his fervor to get them out. "Because I'm not - not that there's anything wrong with that. You're just saying that to get me flustered and so you can laugh…"

Prentiss smiled gently at him. "Is it working?"

Reid quirked his lips to the side in acknowledgement.

"I still say prove it." Morgan looked at Reid, his eyes twinkling mysteriously. "You might be right in your point, but it would save you a lot of strife if you proved it somehow. I am a master at the jokes."

Prentiss and Garcia rolled their eyes at that.

"You don't have to, Reid." Garcia said, patting Reid on his wiry shoulder. "We all know you're not."

But, obviously, Spencer Reid's mind was set in steely determination. He didn't know how he was going to produce adequate proof, but he was going to do it. The challenge was issued and he had no problem rising to it.

At that opportune moment, fate shined on him.

The door opened, revealing a very tired looking Jennifer Jareau with a file in her hands and an exasperated look on her face. Her feet knocked over one of the containers of the Chinese food and she cursed lightly as the sauced spilled all over the floor.

"Ah!" Garcia shrieked as the food stained her floor.

"Sorry - "

The apology was halfway out of JJ's mouth when Reid jumped out of his swiveling chair, his eyes locked firmly onto the blonde in front of him. His hand grasped at the woman's waist, pulling her toward him and his mouth latched onto hers.

The kiss was fierce, desperate, and reeked of Reid wanting to prove himself. JJ didn't push him away, just stood stock-still in surprise as the genius's mouth worked on hers. The kiss eased into something softer, just a light mashing of lips together, before Reid pulled away, turning toward to face everyone else in the room as his awkward feet crushed even more of the food into the carpet.

" _Boo-yah_!"

And, for some reason, Reid jogged out of the room, jostling JJ slightly as he went, a large grin on his features.

"Uh…I don't even want to ask," JJ said, clearly flustered.

"Did Reid just say _boo-yah_?" Prentiss snickered.

"Oh, that gave me more material than anything he would've done." Morgan grinned happily up at JJ.

At that moment, Hotch entered the room, stomping on some more of the food. The noodles sloshed all over his shiny black shoes. "Oh my God."

Collective laughter spread through the tiny room. Hotch looked disgustedly at the food on his shoes as he tried futilely to kick it off - and all he had wanted to do was to get everyone together for a briefing on their newest assignment.

"Uh," JJ spoke after a while, "we have a case."

"Alright," Prentiss and Morgan chimed in unison as they rose from their seated position on the floor.

"I'm so calling him _'Boo-yah'_ from now on," Prentiss said to Morgan as they followed Hotch and JJ out of the room.

"I'll second that," Morgan said as the door shut behind them.

"Is anyone going to _clean up this mess_?" Garcia shouted at nothing.

Growling to herself, Garcia rose from her seat, rambling around the confines of her lab. She picked up the crushed cartons of Chinese food and put them into the bags they came in. She sighed exasperatedly as she saw the mashed noodles in the carpet.

The moments, the jokes, leading up to the terrible spill in her room played before her eyes, and she found herself smiling.

A carpet cleaning bill was certainly worth all of that.

_Especially Reid mauling JJ like she was made of chocolate,_ Garcia thought, an impish grin on her face as she moved back to the RPG that started it all.


End file.
